“Spitting Seeds”

August 27, 2010 · 14 comments

I caught this fiendish grin coughing up seeds all over one of my pathways this morning. I quickly got a tray and stuck it underneath the vomiting seedpod, carefully picking up the seeds that had already been deposited on the decomposed granite.

Huey…Ralph!

These rather large datura seedpods start off quite hard and green, then they ripen, soften and eventually split, spewing out an enormous amount of seeds in a very drunk “ten pints of lager and a vindaloo” fashion. Oh yes, in a ripened state they are slimy and quite disgusting…but what great hats.

I picked two or three of these pods smeared them around on my tray and left them to bake in the hot Texas sun. I have never tried to grow datura from seed, but after witnessing one of the finest displays from this plant this year, and the Sphingids it attracted: http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2010/08/wilson/, I am determined to have a lot more of it.

I know they are poisonous, I know they contain tropane alkaloids, I know I have kids, I know I have them planted next to a mountain laurel that also drops its potentially lethal red beans all around them…What can I say? The Patch is a dangerous place, if the plants don’t get you, the Naboo surely will.

I have hammered into my children from a very young age what they should avoid doing with certain plants in the garden, and they totally get it, this is one they give a very wide birth, well this, and the mountain laurel, and the oleander, angels trumpet and…

From a crazy grin to some rather irritated eyes…

It appears that Cactus man (junior) has developed another slight retinal irritation, just to add to all the drama that he has already had to endure in his resurrected life… http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2009/10/halloween-2009/

Is it me or is his “small eye” getting smaller? Also, I couldn’t help but notice that he has developed a lot more disturbing lumps on his paddle…(never a good thing).

“You have that right ESP”.

I took my hose and irrigated his eye sockets in an attempt to make him feel a little more comfortable.

On a lighter note:

Coral Vine

Antigonon leptopus

has started to bloom in the Patch this week. These pink blooms are a staple in southeast Asia for bridal bouquets, it is also known as “chain of love”, probably due to heart-shaped leaves and pink flowers that bees cannot resist. I have a love hate relationship with this plant, it can be very invasive if left to its own devices, and it looks like Hell in the winter, so make sure you let it climb in areas where you can get to, to clear out the old growth…and whatever you do, do not let it get anywhere close to some…

…giant timber bamboo, it would like nothing more then to climb up to the top of these culms, it would scale them in seconds!

This is the skinny side of the Patch, lots of utilities and ducts, home to my redneck wind chime. It does not look too bad from this angle but lets pan out a little…

There we go!

On the left side a couple of pink jasmine vines lived happily for some years, but last winter’s freezes sadly took care of them, it is now a complete interwoven mess. I could stand on a step ladder for hours unraveling these strands, but I won’t. I intend to replant at the base with some more vines and let them recover the structure…the gardening equivalent of sweeping the tangled mess under the carpet.

The additional carpet of weeds on the floor are completely out of control. While I was in here, weeding on hands and knees, I disturbed a host of unsavory characters that had made the area their home…

I found a few of these large, very grumpy toads, shortly before I felt something else, something cold and much more sinister, slimming its way around my right wrist. I instinctively flicked my arm in my now traditional conniption fashion which, for some reason, brings my right knee up toward my chin and ends with me looking behind me in a dog like fashion! My spasm sent this unsavory creature slapping onto the side of my house…where it unexpectedly stuck.

What on earth!

“Or perhaps not from Earth ESP, have you considered that”?

I zeroed in on the anomaly with my camera set to macro…it was quite shocking!

In a panic I frantically checked my wrist, half-expecting to see a hole where this alien had burrowed, perhaps leaving a part of itself (Ahhh) inside me to grow, ultimately to consume me from the inside, luckily I found nothing.

This is a land planarian,

Bipalium kewense…

…and it was sufficiently disgusting.

They are grey to brown long flat worms with several dark stripes running down the back. Land planarians thrive in high temperature and humidity, thus they are widely distributed in tropical and subtropical areas. Heads of many land planarians are expanded lunate or tapering to a blunt point. A mouth, which also serves as an anus (shudders), is present near mid-body, these disturbing worms are voracious predators of earthworms, slugs, insect larvae, and like the Naboo (reportedly) are cannibalistic. They are also capable of utilizing their own tissues such as reproductive tissue for food when reserves are exhausted. (repeated swallowing, left knee vibration)

Here is the side alley all cleaned up, well mostly. Now to bide my time before my next granite delivery. An alphonse karr bamboo will be going in, in front of the air conditioning unit to visually hide it from the front of the property.

Now if I can only screen the planarian from my conscious memory, perhaps I will get some sleep tonight?

Stay Tuned for:

“Dive, Dive, Dive”

All material © 2010 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Congratulations on your first week at kindergarten Miss P.

Tagged as: Cactus Man, Coral Vine, Datura, Datura seed pods, First week at Kindergarten, Giant Timber, Hardscaping, Land planarian, Toads

“Wilson”

August 21, 2010 · 14 comments

I have been developing a design for a client in which I have found myself saving file names like: “Wilson_1, Wilson_2″ etc. It just seemed to be a fitting and natural file naming system for a scheme that was to incorporate a tree house, a focal island bed, tropical planting and sandy (okay decomposed granite) weaving jungle trails. Oh yes, I have been in my howler monkeying element.

“Jane…Look, ESP is really going for a jungle look this time, me thinks boy will like this.”

“It is about time Tarzan…call cheetah and the elephants!”

To get further into the spirit of things, I decided to emulate Tarzan by constructing a rudimentary loin cloth by recycling one of my iced turbans (significantly easier to tie). The hobbits put on their Swiss Family Robinson outfits, then, with the light fading, we all huddled up in my children’s sandbox where I attempted to get a fire going, for ambient purposes you understand, it was still 95 degrees after all! I would also suggest that you have an established perimeter planting around your property for privacy reasons before adorning such a garment.

Just in case.

Like a true castaway, my fire was to be created from violently rubbing sticks on top of some cattail fluff on top of some post oak bark, (just to further enhance the Robinson Crusoe charade)…Ohh, but how the mosquitoes immediately began to strip our flesh!

(obligatory Lector noises)

We all took one more swig from my “Whole Foods” coconut and ran quickly inside for cover. I decided a loin cloth, although initially liberating, should not be a garment choice for a summer evening in Texas… (a stark contrast to the extremely practical and revered iced turban). I don’t need to mention how my fire-starting escapade went.

The rear garden of this new scheme is quite large and is predominately sloped dead ground, devoid of grass…just how I like it. Almost slap bang in the center is a stand of live oak trees that the client expressed a desire to be the future home of a magical tree house for her grandchildren (can it get any better?) Around these trees was a raised, semi-defined “island” that is currently covered in ivy and rocks…my imagination began to race…islands, rope bridges, tree-living, basically a perfect Naboo habitat came into my minds eye, a Gilligan’s Island in south Austin.

Most of the back garden is in either shade or semi shaded from the upper oak canopy. I wanted the island to be the focal point, all tropically planted under a tree house worthy of the “Black Pearl’s” crows-nest.

Savvy?

I shrouded (and visually diminished) the shed with two Bambusa multiplex alphonse karr bamboos, with another positioned on the left side of the tire swing to make it more of a destination point, privatizing the area. Jungle pathways were formed to create a better flow through the space which in turn consolidated a lot of fighting mediums and preexisting enclosures and beds.

Strong foliage plants were introduced for perimeter height and to soften up the new perimeter corrugated fence, loquats and fatsia japonica adding evergreen interest.

For the front of the house I decided to open up the doorway area by removing the existing, rather claustrophobic bed. I also introduced an additional sweeping pathway to the side of the house for alternative access to the rear jungle scene. The materials and tones are consistent with the new rear design, visually referencing the existing stone of the house. A new home color scheme punches out some curb appeal, creating a more contemporary, less Tudor aesthetic. What design would be complete without some mounding artemesia, an evergreen wisteria climbing over a simple arbor for some porch fragrance, and a few metal chickens?

Installation begins in a couple of weeks!

Back to the Patch…

…and some very eerie yellow light conditions.

Talking of very eerie things. Remember my disgusting rotten elephant ear that sprouted some side growth? Well, I was giving it a drink this morning when I happened to notice a rather dark hole where the bulb used to be that rotted. Thinking it was just the cavity left behind where it had rotted out I filled it with water from my hose. The strange thing was, the water never pooled up, it just kept immediately draining almost instantly? Odd I thought.

I put the camera in the cavity and took some pictures with the flash on, these shots do not do the tunnel justice…it was deeper then I could see. A Naboo mine shaft perhaps?

Worm sign?

Moving quickly along…

The diagonal fibers on this soft leafed yucca were so perfect that it looked manufactured.

Is that a spider in there? Brrr.

Some plants just go and keep going through our hottest months:

Pride of Barbados…Okay, I promise this will be the last time I blog about it this year.

Evergreen wisteria still as fragrant as it was in June, though it has looked better.

Illuminated by a setting sun, purple fountain grasses offer great late summer / fall color and movement. I treat this grass as an annual and generally use it as a gap filler in the patch, it really works well with purple heart, and set against a shady backdrop it takes on a life of its own.

Finally…

Happy birthday, birthday boy!

“To infinity and Beyond.”

Did you recognize the time / space defying tee-shirt, the one that keeps showing up throughout Earth’s history?

Stay Tuned for:

“Spitting Seeds”

All material © 2010 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Tagged as: Alphonse Karr Bamboo, Birthday Boy, Cattail, Curb Appeal, Design, Evergreen Wisteria, Fire, Hardscaping, Loin cloth, Mine Shaft, pride of barbados, Purple fountain grass, Tarzan, Treehouse, Tropical Island

“Haircuts and Sphingids”

August 14, 2010

Join me this week in the East Side Patch as we take on some unusual nocturnal activities and see some amazing nocturnal creatures getting drunk. We witness some ornamental grasses getting crew-cuts and a spiny lizard that is a little tied up. A cicada shell scares me to death and I find out that lacewing eggs do not do well in an traditional English breakfast.

Go on, read some more!... 17 comments

“Expeliamus”!

August 10, 2010

A photography entry.

Go on, read some more!... 11 comments

“Silence is Golden”

November 6, 2009

Continued… As I leaned forward, duct tape at the ready, her botoxed lips reverberated with every exhale, showering me with an extraordinary amount of saliva. She was still fast asleep, or so I thought, but I began to worry…would the adhesive work with such an abundance of moisture? I soldiered on, ever closer. It seemed [...]

Go on, read some more!... 21 comments

“The Sacrifice”

November 10, 2009

photo curtesy of Dave http://www.flickr.com/photos/grizdave/ The strangest thing happened to me the other day… Hiking in an uncharted patch of the Patch, I noticed that I was ascending, I climbed steadily uphill for about two solid hours. I suddenly came to a clearing on top of a huge rock, it seems my rock was one [...]

Go on, read some more!... 16 comments

A Hard Days Work in the Garden?

November 16, 2009

What better at the end of a hard days work in the garden, then to sit down on your back deck, to savor a deliciously refreshing, ice cold… “Value Lager”? Life doesn’t get any better, or generic, does it?

Go on, read some more!... 6 comments

“The Company of Wolves”

November 17, 2009

Painting of the famous rhyme Little Red Riding Hood by French painter Fleury Francois Richard (1777-1852). Louvre Museum. We recently were talking about this rather surreal tale in the Patch, (my eldest hobbit is reading “Little Red”) so I thought I would check it out in a little more detail. As it turns out [...]

Go on, read some more!... 20 comments

“Baggins and Tape”

November 21, 2009

“In the event of a water landing, I have been designed to serve as a flotation device” And even more rain in Central Texas…and even more mosquitoes, although I have noticed that they are getting slower, their desperation for the red matter making them easier to swat. There are also some mosquito-monsters, what is that? [...]

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

“The Leaf, the Witch and the Water-feature”

November 25, 2009

One rainy day, our children decided to explore our house in more detail, our eldest, was curious about the wardrobe in our empty back room. She soon discovered that it was a portal to a snow-covered forest with a landscaped garden that featured a focal gas-light garden “room” in the center. It was here she [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Wind in our Sails”

December 5, 2009

“Climb the rigging to the curtain rail” “Secure the jib to the TV” “Yarr, there is a squall coming”… …and the squall has really been catching the mainsail in our living room. That’s right, our front room now resembles the “sailing” Monti Python building in The Meaning of Life, although I wish I could say, [...]

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

“Down the Rabbit Hole”

December 8, 2009

Quite literally! Rabbit holes have a very different meaning to me than the average person, why? Well first of all, as a kid, I spent a lot of time around them, inside them, or digging through them. I would invariably find myself at dusk, high up on an exposed Scottish fell with an arm extended [...]

Go on, read some more!... 9 comments

“Twelve ESP Days of Christmas”

December 14, 2009

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me, Twelve mother of millions, Eleven pipers piping, Ten blooms are blooming, Nine ladies dancing, (what?…I had nothing!) Eight stink horns stinking, (okay still struggling)! Seven swans a-swimming, The Botox Lady’s spraying, FIVVEEE “precious” rings… Four inflatable turds! Three Naboo Men, Two anoles in love, [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Has he Been”?

December 20, 2009

This anole is currently living in our Christmas tree! I tried to get it outside but it just came right back in through one of our many gaps and holes in our walls. I suppose it was finding some “relative” warmth, or perhaps it is just getting into the Christmas spirit, hard to tell. I [...]

Go on, read some more!... 16 comments

“Milk, Cookies and Spells”

December 23, 2009

It was getting late in the Patch, and some major spells were being cast on me from deep within the amaranth. Horsetail reeds make for excellent wands it appears, though my eldest hobbit insists she got hers from Diagon alley. Expelliarmus! Some of these spells take an immense amount of concentration it appears. Now will [...]

Go on, read some more!... 22 comments

“2010″

December 29, 2009

2010 started eerily in the Patch… I walked outside this morning only to find this other-worldly mist sweeping in, and it was dense. The other thing odd about this morning was that it was very quite, unusually quite in fact. I clambered further into my timer bamboo for a better look at this strange phenomena. [...]

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Winter’s Beauty”

January 3, 2010

Echeveria pup, sea salted with morning frost…Good enough to eat. My entry for this months “Winter’s Beauty” garden photography competition http://www.gardeninggonewild.com Here is another shot of the same plant taken on a warmer day (not my entry)…

Go on, read some more!... 26 comments

“Carnival”

January 6, 2010

Brrrr, another freezing front blows through Central Texas, but what do I care, I hear the carnival setting up camp in the Patch… Okay we might not have all the lights, rides, and well practically anything else you would normally find or associate with a carnival, but we do have this… “Looking good now ESP, [...]

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

“Frost Bitten, Twice Shy”

January 11, 2010

Oh yes we remain gripped in a Harry Potter craze in the Patch, can you tell? Only this time the craze requires copious amounts of Ibuprofen upon completion of a reenactment. The latest, and repetitive request in the ESP is to be repeatedly “flown” around the decomposed granite pathways whilst “the flyer” is playing a [...]

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Put the Petal to the Metal”

January 20, 2010

Warmer weather returns to the East Side Patch, and it is time for a sotol to be pruned up. Where are the bandages?

Go on, read some more!... 9 comments

“Jagged Little Pill-Bug”

January 23, 2010

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you”… Closed We often see them as we dig the ground… they are the charmers of children, these animated little martian probes. Follow me on my nerdy journey (snorts) to find out a little more about these “Bakugans” of the insect realm. The pill bug is the only crustacean ( [...]

Go on, read some more!... 22 comments

“Journey to the Center of the Patch”

January 31, 2010

“Is there anything left alive in there”? “Look how brown everything is”. “Is that a frozen Naboo tribal member stuck on the Botox lady’s lip”? “This is serious”. Central Texas is back once again in the grip of yet another cold spell, I knew we were not going to get away with just one killer [...]

Go on, read some more!... 17 comments

“Bottom of ze Barrel”

February 5, 2010

“foul is fair and fair is foul.” I caught the ESP witches milling around this frost bitten shrub this evening on top of one of my mounds, (and YES, those are my citrus trees in the background!) Something had prematurely brought this foul trio down from out of my post oak. My heart immediately sank [...]

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Winter Wormwood”

February 9, 2010

Gardening Gone Wild… “Picture This” Photo Contest entry: February 2010: “Winter Light” Frosted-over Artemisia ‘Powis Castle’ mound, getting hit with early morning sun beams. The plant recovered completely from this nipping a day or so later.

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Hell Raiser, Star Chaser”

February 12, 2010

Hardscaping my hell-strip has led me to completely revisit the whole of my front garden design, forming it into a more naturalistic and visually organic scheme.

Go on, read some more!... 8 comments

“Planes, Trains and North Sea Ferries”

February 19, 2010

You do not want to be with me on any type of public transportation…trust me, I am a traveling companion’s liability. “Six coaches of the 1400 Glasgow to London express passenger train carrying about 300 passengers became derailed as the train approached Harrow and Wealdstone station. The train came to rest with the locomotive and [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Captain’s Log… Supplemental”

February 22, 2010

It is amazing what creativity even the smallest amount of snow creates. Check out this sub-space snow anomaly that showed up in the Patch snow.

Go on, read some more!... 18 comments

“I Tripped over a Leaffooter”

February 28, 2010

An examination of the massive Leaffooter bug, and a look at what plants are re-emerging in the Patch after the winter, plants like the bauhinia corymbosa vine.

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Feather Hugger”

March 5, 2010

This young feather hugger is totally into the feather grass, it jumps from clump to clump hugging and hiding under it. This cat, according to it’s collar, is called “Nina Coconut,” and it seems like it has adopted the Patch as it’s playground, at least for the time being. It can also scale my Douglas [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Toad in the Hole”

March 12, 2010

With the painting in the Patch almost finished, it was time I created some more work for myself, today the Eye of Sauron cast a cold gaze on this garden scene… The scale of this Mexican weeping bamboo and the stock-tanked golden bamboo where the Tahoe hit has disturbed me for quite some time. The [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Gardening Gone Wild Photo Contest”:

March 13, 2010

Here is my entry for this months Gardening Gone Wild photography competition : “Awakening”. A tiny Mexican feather grass, battling the germination odds to emerge from this tiny Zen pocket in a Texas holey rock. What are the odds?

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Life and Death”

March 18, 2010

With the rains have come a bumper bloom and a pronounced artificial grape aroma all around my back porch… …this week is the week of the Mountain Laurel in Central Texas. Sophora secundiflora I keep this one pruned up as high as I can, I think they look better when the trunk is partially exposed. [...]

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Jurassic Patch”

March 26, 2010

Venture underground in the East Side Patch to witness Naboo temples, giant anoles and ancient plants.
See what spring is emerging and awakening in the Patch.

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Bread Rock”

April 1, 2010

Gross happenings in the East Side Patch…Rotten Taro tickles gag valves, hanging roach, and metallic flies grace this nasty post. Spring also delivers a host of new life and emergence this week in the Patch. Drop in and have a bucket at the ready!

Go on, read some more!... 18 comments

“Garden Bloggers’ Design Workshop” – Garden Benches

April 3, 2010

See an improvised garden bench get built in the Patch. No planning, very few tools and not a straight line in sight, oh yes, the Waltons would have been proud.
Drop in to also visit a mock orange in full bloom.

Go on, read some more!... 21 comments

“Picture This Photo Contest”

April 3, 2010

“Picture This Photo Contest” Entry.
The theme for this months contest is “Green World”.

Go on, read some more!... 18 comments

“Poppy Patch”

April 7, 2010

Poppy along into the Patch this week for some charismatic feather grass, some stinky “martian-mallows” that will make your hair curl and some dating anoles residing in the bird box. Salvia and ragwort dominate the color wheel, while we witness a rather odd insect increasing it’s population. William Wallace and the Naboo make cameo appearances.

Go on, read some more!... 13 comments

“Lady-bug-Gaga”

April 16, 2010

Insects are coming out of the word-work this week, quite literally. See termites flooding out of my house where the Tahoe hit, there is also Lady Gaga dressed up as a ladybug, and a ladybug dressed up as Lady Gaga. There is the finest garden sushi, escargot and blushing strawberries, all on special on the East Side Patch menu this week. Drop in for a bite and see a snail harvest in motion.

Go on, read some more!... 19 comments

“Men in Blackfoot daisies”

April 19, 2010

An alien vessel was sighted high up in the sky this week in the Patch. A few hours later, the Men in Blackfoot daisies showed up on my doorstep asking some rather unusual questions. We all devoured sour strawberries and I showed them the pictures that I had taken.
Mexican feather grasses and gaura combination steals the show this week in the garden.

Go on, read some more!... 5 comments

“One Too Many Beers”

April 27, 2010

Check out the first early spring insects that have arrived in the Patch, there are whites, water snails, soldier flies, hair-streaks and a host of others to look into. William Wallace has a panic-attack at the sight of an emerging dwarf bottle-brush bloom, and I catch a strange looking lobster with the advice of the crew of the Cornelius Marie. Witness the advances of a Hoja santa plant into my neighbors yard and the destruction of my Mexican lime tree…a sad day for the Naboo tribe.

Go on, read some more!... 20 comments

“Chicken and Hell-Strips”

May 2, 2010

A strange chicken visits the Patch and a hosepipe creates mayhem for one little person. This week the Hell-strip gets a top layer of decomposed granite and some plants go in. A laugher caterpillar makes a hairy appearance and the Patch oleanders are in full-bloom. Join us once again in the ESP, but avoid the soup at all costs, no matter how much the cook insists you try it.

Go on, read some more!... 5 comments

“Knotty Dreads”

May 8, 2010

The Patch feather grasses get their hair pulled this week to remove some of their knotty dreads. I discovered by accident a new technique as to how to remove their panicles whilst still maintaining a natural, non-snipped look. The hair from the grasses formed seed-bales in my trash can. Check out a butterfly that was feeding on me, and a couple of newly created small beds around the Patch bench.
On a darker note…I think the Cactus Man may have returned from the dead…muh ha ha ha!

Go on, read some more!... 6 comments

“Emergance”

May 10, 2010

Come into the Patch this week and bring your hurling bucket as we witness something usually reserved for science fiction movies. Milk thistle history is on the topic list and a colorful orchard spider casts it’s web over one of my stock tanks. Threadleaf ragwort goes to seed and the tomatoes ripen. Join us for another nerdy week in the ESP.

Go on, read some more!... 9 comments

“While the Neighbor’s Away…The Patch will Play”

May 18, 2010

Some guerrilla gardening goes down in the Patch this week as the neighbors Hell-Strip is tackled while the house is vacant. Find out what a female Boll’s sand roach drags behind her (Brrrr) and what she eats! Join us this week as a Snowberry Clearwing is spotted floating around the verbena, and see a small trash carrying bug with a roving eye. Avoid the gopher sap, and do not encourage the gossipy beetles on your way in.

Go on, read some more!... 8 comments

“I do like to be beside the Seaside…”

May 29, 2010

Some serious shelling of bluebonnet seeds took place this week in the Patch, I get attacked by mosquitoes while daydreaming about the beach. Everything has been heating up this week in Texas…tomatoes are ripening with temperatures soaring, iced turbans are now officially being adorned. Have a look at sacred detura, you will be amazed what this plant is used for and the effect it can have on a group of soldiers. Join me for another psychedelic trip in the East Side Patch.

Go on, read some more!... 6 comments

“Carry on up the Nile”

June 3, 2010

A bizarre new creature is found scoffing away on my tomato plants! This week we venture deep into the heart of Egypt to visit sphinx’s in the garden. Follow the discovery of giant worms, giant piles of…., and ancient curses. There is a dangerous anole rescue and the finest gold to be discovered in this episode of the ESP.

Go on, read some more!... 3 comments

Photography Competition:

June 6, 2010

Anoles in love.

Go on, read some more!... 6 comments

Snips & Snails & Swallowtails

June 8, 2010

Pop into the Patch this week for some cosmic coneflowers, a demonic Pipevine Swallowtail larvae, and some Gothic evergreen wisteria that has popped into bloom this week above the Alice in Wonderland bench. Also witness worms in an eggplant, an army of aphids trying to scale the fence to my tomatoes, and a crazy tomatillo plant. Also a silver-spotted skipper makes William Wallace question his war-paint colors on the battlefield! See you in the East-Side.

Go on, read some more!... 9 comments

“Animal House”

June 14, 2010

All manner of animals and creatures are captured in the Patch this week. Giant swallowtail butterflies and their bird dropping lavae are witnessed on my citrus trees, and an Io moth caterpillar is discovered under my English Ivy. Drop into the ESP this week to see a host of insects, lizards, butterflies, eggs and larvae. Witness a watermelon devourer going to town and have a goodnight, Walton style.

Go on, read some more!... 17 comments

“Shaken not Stirred”

June 21, 2010

Who said that the Patch does not have flowers! Well at least a few of them. This week my neurotic Vitex tree creates a few logistical entryway problems, and a neurotic albino squirrel makes me totally paranoid. This week we explore foliage and flowers that can handle the Texas summer heat, we also get a rare, impromptu visitation from 007 and Goldmember of all people.

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Tales of the Unexpected”

June 26, 2010

I thought I would share a recent design scheme that I worked up for a client. The design proposal addressed three distinct areas of the existing garden: Front of house…what was once a static lawn becomes a softened low maintenance bed of movement, courtesy of a perimeter planting of bamboo muhly grass and the introduction [...]

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

“Deep Breath”

June 28, 2010

Take a dive into the blue hole, and climb back out again…amazing!

Go on, read some more!... 10 comments

“Moi Grande Rain Dance”

July 2, 2010

The heavens opened up for some rare summer prolonged rains this week in the Patch. We went punting down the decomposed granite canals where we witnessed a host of creatures and blooms, the star of the show being the enormous Moi Grande hibiscus bloom. Join us this week for some ethereal spores, some new insects, even a new anole is found this week in the East Side Patch. Don’t forget your raincoat.

Go on, read some more!... 14 comments

“Garden Coffins”

July 9, 2010

This week in the ESPatch we take a short trip to a local strip-mall to witness a depressing planter that has an identity crises. We will look a dragonfly straight in its 30,000 eyes and witness some big game hunters in action. I have an idea of how to put my dead bamboo to good use whilst trying to avoid the lazy gazing eye of Cactus Man (Junior).

Go on, read some more!... 21 comments

“Withering Sights”

July 17, 2010

Join me this week and witness a cannibalistic dragonfly that ultimately causes the death of an innocent grasshopper at the nimble fingers of Bear Grylls. This week we witness a green lynx spider that threatens the viability of William Wallace’s hairy legs, we see a papyrus in bloom and get better acquainted with an old southern edible…pokeweed, a plant that has mysteriously turned up in the Patch.

Go on, read some more!... 19 comments

“Nose Boulder”

July 24, 2010

A crazy nasal boulder / restaurant experience will have you retching into a bucket, if this doesn’t immediately tickle your gag valve, then the three lined lema beetle surly will, piling it’s excrement up onto it’s back! This week witness a host of new visitors to the Patch, including: the Canna Leaf Roller, a Squash Vine Borer, and a long horned beetle. We also witness a dragonfly that has had a lobotomy, and a squash vine borer. This week a rare Naboo tribal member was captured on film by the Germinatrix!…A historical event, not to be missed.

Go on, read some more!... 17 comments

“On The Chain Gang”

August 1, 2010

A visit to the East Side Patch this week will reveal a small tee shirt that appears to turn up in different time periods throughout Earth’s history. This week we witness a mammoth delivery of decomposed granite for a design that I am currently implementing, as well as some equally enormous amaranth and pride of Barbados plants. Moonflowers and a Nessus Sphinx Moth headline this latest escapade in the Patch, we also get to see how an anole and a dragonfly deal with their differences.

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

“It Ain’t Half Hot Mum!…ESP On Tour”

August 8, 2010

Join me this week and find out a little more about the trials and tribulations of tying and wearing iced turbans in the heat of the Texas summer. See a front garden make over and get to hear me once again droning on and on about pride of Barbados plants. Meet a small intellectual conducting research under a poke weed plant and witness a particularly spiny caterpillar.

Go on, read some more!... 12 comments

← Previous Entries