As it turned out, I couldn’t.

The tooth fairy will be fluttering into the Patch tonight, let me back up a little.

She came home, sticking her tongue behind her front tooth, forcing it forward to a particularly unnatural angle (which looked completely ridiculous). She quietly asked me how I used to pull out my loose teeth when I was a kid. I barely finished telling her when she came back from the kitchen, sat beside me, reached into her mouth with a paper towel and tugged…

Not thinking she would actually go through with my “procedure”, her actions took me by complete surprise…”pop”!

I believe I was wincing more then her, the sound of her tooth exiting her gum had me up and about, involuntary performing a silly walk around my front room.

Quickly changing the subject…

After receiving a recent dowsing of rain (just shy of four inches) in classic Texas gully-washer fashion, these Gothic toadstools emerged overnight.

Calm down Bella!

This one was particularly disgusting, but I have had a lot worse in the Patch…who could forget this:

http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2009/04/my-sweet-olive-oil/

Another fast responder to the rains are the

oxalis,

Fatsia Japonica and

my Persian ivy. 

Weeds have also responded positively to a “wee-nip” of the wet stuff…

I have been pulling out massive amounts of dandelions and a bunches of these

Erodium cicutarium

or Redstem Storks Bill (the fruit of the plant resembles a bird’s beak).

Not a bad looking weed really. The finely divided leaves and rosette growth habit are distinctive features of this winter annual weed.

I was also informed by Patricia that traditionally a leaf tea from the plant was used to induce sweating and as a diuretic. The leaves have also been put to use in the bathtub to help treat rheumatism.

Thanks for this Patricia.

Now where is my trowel?

Bluebonnets, poppies, blood-stained celosia and more weeds are battling it out in the Hellstrip

it looks like it will be a good show come the spring.

These feather grasses are in desperate need of a good grooming

and gopher plants are ready to be cut back.

The new central growth offers a good reminder of when it is time for some pruning. I generally wait until the older longer stalks start to look really bad before I attack them. Be sure to wear gloves, the sap from this plant can be quite an irritant…I found out the hard way:

http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2010/11/“i-decapitated-a-gopher”/

Moving on:

Lots of purple and pinks showing up this week in the Patch…lantana and artemesia ‘Powis Castle’.

Desert trumpet blooms do not last long on the vine with snaggletooth around.

Finally:

Back to the rock tumbling…snort

I am relieved to say that we have passed onto the final stage…polishing. Every time he lifts the lid to this cooler and rock tumbler he emits the same refrain: “Phew, that stinks!”…and it really does.

No need to call the authorities, this is the aluminum oxide polish going into the drum.

and here are the rounded stones pre-polishing.

Now to wait yet another ten days, it is a long process this rock tumbling business and it is testing my patience almost as much as “The Rime of the Ancient Mariner”…I said almost.

I will leave you with this image outside a restaurant in east Austin:

Chickens going to roost.

Stay Tuned for:

“Turning the Corner”

All material © 2012 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Inspirational Image of the week:

It is that time again…

…the time of cattails,

Typha latifolia

a little later than usual,

but the furry corn dogs are finally ready, and so were my halflings.

Cattail spells were cast on long wands, sending fluff floating high into the sky,

only to rain down into eyes,

and onto the end of long Anubis noses.

Next years crop of cattail wands is going to be a lot larger as I have now introduced another bog tank dedicated to this versatile marginal plant.

While all this activity was going on I decided to ignite a corn dog myself (as you do) to see just how good of a tinder these plants actually make.

This time I made sure I was not in close proximity to any of my ornamental grasses.

Moving along:

I checked on the two tiny plumosa ferns that I planted against my gate a few weeks back.

One has wasted no time climbing up the iron frame. These two plants will eventually cover and soften this arched gate,

like the entrance to a Hobbiton domicile…

well, that is the goal at least.

This plumosa in another part of the Patch has been strangling this Tikki torch for quite some time. I decided to unravel it,

then re-ravel it onto a more permanent structure.

My rosemary bushes are in full form at the moment, most of them are blooming or just about to.

Can you have too many?…

I know I have, and they are huge, great for an entryway.

Winter foliage color provided by a purple leaf sand cherry,

Prunus x cistena

and my ever-spreading desert trumpet vine, also known as Port St.John’s Creeper or Port St.John’s-klimop.

This vine looks great when most things don’t.

Just as she was making a new friend the hatchling’s rather large mother returned…

Hand sanitizer!

Finally:

Getting smoother now…

I am proud to announce that we have now entered the 3rd stage (pre-polishing) rock tumbling phase (snort), this phase apparently lasts between 7 and 10 days,

A little more enthusiasm is in order here Hermione?

Stay Tuned for:

“You Can’t Handle the Tooth”

All material © 2012 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Finally Christmas!

This pyramid candle really helped to bridge the long wait for Christmas having tiny gifts embedded into it. The prospect of retrieving some “Pharaoh’s treasure” fueled her imagination for hours…okay 4.5 minutes.

“Daddy? How long do candles take to burn?”

“Hmmph?…Zzzz”

The first eardrum shattering 7am squeals started when they both ripped open some junior golf clubs from their grandparents in Scotland.

She could not wait to try them out on the range a couple of days later.

He got a retro post-apocalyptic phaser,

that made the most annoying obnoxious sounds imaginable. (The psychologically damaging part of the holidays)

What was I thinking? Oh yes…cool design.

This made him very happy.

She got her…

La La Loopsie doll,

a not-so-Easy Bake oven,

and her long awaited rock tumbler that has been tumbling a bunch of rocks since Christmas day. It takes a month to turn sharp raw stones into polished gems.

We took a sneak peak at them five days into the coarse abrasive phase (naturally), and already the stones were significantly smoother.

Even Kumo got a prime steak chop on Christmas day!

He devoured most of it before frantically running around with a really desperate expression on his face, looking for a place to bury the remainder.  For dessert he apparently opted for a large chunk of plastic attached to a string, this gastronomic episode sadly landed him in hospital requiring an hour-long stomach operation.

Poor Kumo.

He is still in the hospital and doing a little better, we all have our fingers crossed that he will pull through and make a full recovery.

Moving Sadly On:

Rosemary is looking particularly healthy and festive after finally getting some rain,

and so are the weeds. This green clump seemed to spring up overnight.

I planted a couple more Plumosa Ferns at the base of my steel gate a few weeks back,

and they have almost doubled in size with the recent moisture.

A visually frosty and festive scene courtesy of a neighbors China-berry and my Blue Ice cypress

Cuppressus arizonica var. glabra ‘Blue Ice’

And now we are having clear crisp days,

days perfect for…

lighting large fires with my new

“Bear” knife and magnesium striker.

Fires that keep the wild ESP cats at bay.

It has been a busy two weeks off school for the halflings,

I immediately got them to work on gathering seeds from this year’s rather poor crop of celosia.

It is tedious work but the challenge of getting the emptied husks into a bucket on the floor helped relieve the monotony, or so I thought.

“I am Sooo tired of shelling celosia”?

“Me too sis, I am ready to annoy everyone with my phaser again”.

Hey you two…did I say we were on a break?!

Finally:

A new “visitor” dropped into the Patch pond cypress tree this week…

Oh stop it!…It is an owl…just an owl!

Stay Tuned for:

“Just Leaf it Alone”

All material © 2011 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Happy New Year from us all in the Patch!

River Walk : San Antonio

And have a great “Bells” to all my family and friends in the Scottish borders:

Scary things agaves.

“OVATIFOLIA!”

Talking of being scared…

This was the scene shortly after Kumo had managed to rip the beak off his second mallard to get access to the stuffing. This is his:

“schave me from my-shelf” face. He is especially partial to the plastic quacking part.

After our recent rain, (yes we finally got a little), the moss and lichen on these moss boulders quickly reanimated.

This is my favorite type of rock to use in a landscape for a number of reasons;

the life,

The color,

and the shine.

I have recently moved quite a few tons of moss boulders into this back garden that I have just finished installing.

The homeowner was tired of trying to keep the turf grass alive and desired a more native and drought tolerant planting scheme to reduce water usage…perfect.

There was a lot of scale-inappropriate shrubbery and a rather random island that was filled with my favorite Asiatic ground cover,

of course this had to go…immediately.

This was the proposed design scheme. The grade rises toward the back wall so I opted for a natural retainer wall of…you guessed it, moss boulders. I initially considered limestone, but I required more height.

But first it has to look worse before it looks better, a rather disturbing phase if you are not accustomed to it.

At this stage there is a certain “Battle of the Bulge” or perhaps “Operation Market Garden”aesthetic going on, but thankfully it does not last long.

It was time to bring in the heavy artillery to lay a rather large array of moss boulders.

Here they are before they are leveled and orientated. After the tear out, the existing yucca now really stand out

And here is the final garden with decomposed granite and Tejas black gravel, back-filling the boulders and reducing erosion.

These miscanthus grasses worked out really well, catching the late afternoon dappled light.

Here is a panoramic view of the area. Taking out those overgrown shrubs against the house (the over-exposed area) really made the space feel so much larger and less claustrophobic.

Here is the newly planted replacement bed for those overgrown shrubs, that is a sabal major against the far fence and a sweet olive in-between more dwarf miscanthus for fragrance.

Back in the Patch:

One more shot of these fragrant mist flowers.

I just recently found out that these plants can tolerate shade…I had no idea.

One of my favorite plants at this time of year is the copper canyon daisy.

I lost all but one of my mature plants in this summers furnace, their replacements are providing some sporadic blooms.

Flowers are not a problem for the blackfoot daisies in my hell-strip.

Finally:

I have never seen so many tiny sryphid flies as this year:

They apparently like the strange gasoline odor of this epazote which was given to me from Cheryl over there at: http://consciousgardening.blogspot.com/

This Mexican herb is really good if you eat a lot of beans,

and develop some of this. (I decided to spare you the video clip).

It has been used in Mexican cuisine for thousands of years dating back to the Aztecs who used it for cooking as well as for medicinal purposes. The herb is poisonous in large doses.

On that (ahem) “note”:

Stay Tuned for:

“The Incredible Bulk”

All material © 2011 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

“Was that you”?

“No, that was not me, that was you”

“I assure you it most certainly was not”…Wait, aren’t we the same person?…

…Kumo! Kumo!