Drastic measures call for drastic solutions…I thought this might be one of them…wrong!

The conditions in my pond looked pretty dismal to say the least. Each morning I expected the worst…more dead fish, and there were quite a few. The day after I changed and cleaned my filters I went to a local water gardening center to buy some “Microbe LIft,” a solution that breaks down organic matter in ponds. I have had a lot of success with this product in the past, and I usually have some on hand for such an emergency, but of course when I needed it most, naturally I didn’t have any. On the way out of the door of the center, I asked about water vacuum prices, just out of curiosity, and as it turned out, they rented large ones out for $20! yes, this had to be the solution, I was convinced.

“I will rid my water feature of organic build-up,
my pond will be clear, and my fish healthy.”

After a five minute orientation session about which hoses went where, and the attributes of each nozzle head, I humped the coiled-up monstrosity out to the car, and shoved it into the boot/trunk.

I knew I should have listened more intently in the orientation class for as soon I got the thing home and unravelled its many tentacles, cords and accessories, I knew I was in trouble.
All the while, my “Primordial Soup” was burping and bubbling in the stocktank behind me.
This was a race against time, and, looking down at the bewildering array of tubes and hoses, I realized I might be falling behind.


The scene reminded me of something from the movie “Brazil”

I finally got the whole system set up in what I hoped was the correct configuration, and with my wife at the helm of the on/off button, I shouted :

Engage!

The machine whirred into action like H.G. Well’s time machine, with some obligatory spluttering and gurgling, and the general defience you would expect from a device that looked like this, and did what it did.

The most annoying thing about this machine, was that every time one of the internal chambers (oh yes, it had chambers, three to be precise) was filled, it was supposed to evacuate the contents via yet another tube into a garden bed or where ever. Needless to say this seamless evacuation never happened, at least not with my machine. The pipe was simply too loose, every time it emptied “torpedo bay #1″, it would just pop off at the source, sending a few gallons of the finest pond sludge lapping gently around my ankles to attract a now massing crowd of mosquitos. AAArrrggghhh! Oh and to top it all off, the pond was so murky I could not see what I was trying to suck up, this activity was stirring everything up even more, making matters worse.

On one occasion I heard a rather loud “ker-plop,” I immediately hit the “Red Alert” button and looked at my wife with a shell shocked expression, “tell me that was not a fish.”

This was not working. Time to put this creature that “sucked” back in its box.

I spent the next hour trying to coil the abomination back into its original “form”, it was like a mad Chinese puzzle, only this one would flick pond sludge at you every time you made a mistake. I carried it to my porch where it did one last “pond burp” over my deck,  just for old times sake.

I was so tired of dealing with this thing.

I reached for my “Microbe Lift” and my measuring jug, feeling disturbed  that the machine had somehow got the better of me.

I also put my fountain in the pond to try to introduce more oxygen.
Now I needed to wait a few days to see if this worked.

It has been a week since I administered the “Microbe Lift” and purged some of the toad spawn. look at the result!  The water has completely cleared and the fish are happy again…balance has been restored. Look at this before and after picture.

I could now go and rent the vacuum again because I would now be able to see what I was doing, but mmm,…I think I will just wait a little while.

And now for something completely different.

I caught this pod on one of my Pride of Barbados plants that has gone to seed. I was going to post a dug-out canoe comparative but this one seems more fitting…a new life in a protective sleeve, asleep for now but shortly to wake, and grow.

The color on the inside looks like a fine piece of teak furniture, staying with the Pride of Barbados a moment…

The bloom of the Barbados is as hot as the weather it enjoys.

This one looks like a Pride of Barbados but isn’t, it has foliage, thorns and flowers similar to the Pride of Barbados but clearly, due to its size, is very different. I believe this is a tree in Mexico, and prevalent in the Yucatan. This one dies back in the Winter but I do not cut it all the way back to ground like I do with the Barbados, it continues to get bigger every year. Any ideas what it is?

And finally one last Barbados…

Cherry Barbados getting ready to bloom – it gets
so many bees on it, it is a challenge to walk past it.

Bat-face cuphea, Cuphea llavea ‘Bat Face’

An Austin mascot and fitting that is was Bat Fest this weekend.

The shadow on this Agave caught my attention.

Honey bee on a purple heart flower.

Some summer blooms picked this week.

The blooms on my Pampass grasses are just now starting to emerge. This one on the left is one of the pinker varieties.

Look how quickly this succulent bed has filled in, I planted it up in May! It will be interesting to see how many of them will get through the winter.

Sage, sage and even more lemongrass. The Mexican bush sage in the foreground has really filled in with the recent rain we have had.

Sage and burgandy Canna Lily.

Looking out to the back yard.

Remember my redneck pond….
Sshhhhh! they will never know!

Stay Tuned for:
“Shiver me treated Timbers”

All material © 2008 for east_side_patch. Unauthorized reproduction prohibited.

Warning!

This post contains scenes not suitable for young children or people with heart conditions. The post contains scenes of death and mass genocide.


Remember these guys? well they have been busy! rather too busy as it turns out.

I have had my pond for five years, It is a 900 Gallon stock tank, and I must say it has been brilliant. I have had no trouble with critters due to the steep sides, and apart from cleaning my filter on occasion, it really hasn’t been any hassle….until recently, the last three days actually. It all started with a hatch of tadpoles shortly after the recent rain we have had. When I say hatch I mean a hatch of Biblical proportions, it turned the waters black, the clouds darkened, and the birds stopped chirping… this was just the start of the holocaust. I can only assume it has something to do with the drought in Central Texas then the recent rains, the toads just went bananas, I could even hear them during daylight hours, up to their toady shenanigans. That is not the norm!

As with any plague comes death, and subsequently an imbalance in the natural eco-system, my pond is no exception. So far I have lost 5 fish that I have had for years, and I fear more will follow. The spike in oxygen depletion and an erratic build up of ammonia in the water is my current prognosis.

I have had this poor girl for years, now she is buried and pushing up the daises. This was a rather large goldfish. Goodbye silver princess, I promise that your composted remains will be put to good use.

Arrggh! all these tadpoles, and I just got my hair fixed!

I love toads as much as the next gardener, but this has got to be dealt with. The pictures do not relay the extent of this “infestation”. My filters are clogged with them, the fish can’t breath without inhaling them, they are that dense. I needed to do some tadpole culling. I went out today and bought a new fine mesh net to do some skimming and another “sock” net to strap over my water outlet from my pump to catch even more. I also set up the fountain/filter that usually resides in my feeder tank to try to get more oxygen into the tank water as well. It cannot hurt.
My other fish are also not looking good, (shallow breathing and tadpoles attached to them).

Think this but with 5 tadpoles instead of the sucker fish!

Poor water quality = poor fish, this is a desperate scene. One I don’t wish ever to see again.

This is how many that passed through my filter system in a couple of hours!…stocking, I mean shocking!. The mesh sock seems to be clearing some of them out, I am afraid it is too little too late. I am going to the Emerald Garden tomorrow to pick up some ”Microbe Lift” to try to eat some of the waste material in the pond. Any other suggestions welcome.

When I was done thinning out some of the poor tadpoles I noticed this Pompei scene on the hot Texas rocks. It also reminded me of:

Cave men also had filtration issues as it turns out.
This was a caveman’s blog image, posted on a wall,
The artist knew it was quicker to paint it
than use an online modem.

Oh and to top my ponds struggle off, my fish decided this was a good time to hatch as well…..Ahhhhhhh!

“And now for something completely different”…

I am hoping someone can identify these crazy beetles that are buzzing everywhere in my yard right now, I should really know what they are! I have to execute all manner of erratic dances and head jerks to avoid getting hit by them on my way to my “ratty” shed. I now have whiplash. They are also really loud, like June bugs when they “try” to fly, they also have the same navigational issues. I love the metallic green and forms of these bugs, could be inspirational for a new design of a motorbike or car. The color scheme is amazing.

…and while we are on the bug subject, this tiny one was having a great time on my citrus tree, are these beneficial or not? What is this little guy?

Other recorded happenings in the yard right now:

Cannas and toad stools blooming after the recent rain.

A natural weave!

Exploding Dwarf Papyrus.

The Lunar surface all turned over.

This plant has one of these on each of its 4 leafs. I imagine they intend to depart the mother ship soon to root. Perhaps I will give them a helping hand.

This lily was half submerged, it looked like sea anenome.

Click then click again to see the incredible wing structure of this blue dragonfly.

Stay Tuned for:
“Primordial Soup”

All material © 2008 for east_side_patch. Unauthorized reproduction prohibited.

“Welcome to the jungle baby”

“Oh My Squirrel Gods, he has got his pick axe out of the shed, tell me he isn’t looking for buried treasure again”

I continued hacking my way on top of my compacted lunar surface today. I thought I would take full advantage of the slight reprieve in temperature we are currently having. I was also finding all manner of buried treasure, bottles, glass shards, springs? and what appears to be an old 50′s chevy truck, I wasn’t stopping. I felt I was on the brink of a major archaeological discovery when my pick axe shuddered to a rib braking stop. This was it! perhaps some loot from an old western bank heist? perhaps a buried Wells Fargo safe?, it did sound and feel metallic after all.

As soon as my body stopped reverberating
from the impact, I investigated further…

I went down on my knees and with my newly
purchased archaeological brushes from Breed & Co,
I began my excavation of the artifact.

14 Hours of meticulous brushing later, and I had it, my adrenalin was flowing. The top 1/3rd of it looked like some form of ancient bronze tool. I peered in even closer, I could smell the dirt of the ancients, (mmm, perhaps I should rephrase that one). With gentle leverage, my find emerged into the daylight…it was, it was…….well, it was an old, rusty car jack – presumably the one used on the buried Chevy.

Still, it was a treasure of sorts to me and will
take pride of place somewhere in my yard.
Look at this thing!

One of the previous owners of my house I found out, had “fallen off the utilities map” and subsequently began burying all her trash around the property. I have trash soil! I really do, (and don’t say it fits with my Ratatouille chewed inflatable pool!)
I contemplated if lavender had ever been grown on landfill. I guess I will soon find out.

Staying on the subject ot trash – My dead agave is a) taking on an interesting rotting aesthetic of it’s own and b) now incredibly annoying as I still need to straddle it to cross one of my main pathways (at least there are no spikes on it as yet) yup, that would be really dangerous considering it’s current height. Look at this mangled scene, it reminds me of:

The plants around the agave are also looking really bad, I can’t decide if it is the drought or if the decaying beanstalk is effecting them in some underground way. I still have a rather unhealthy obsession to plant another fifty pups…it is the least I can do for a dying old friend, no matter how irritating.

“George, do you think he is ever going to chop the Agave down … George!

“Calm down Mildred, I am more concerned by the fact that we are being followed by a lily!

Staying next to the pond for a second, this lily is also starting a new family, in the middle of one of the pads. I would imagine this breaks away from the pad at some point to root? I have witnessed little “groupings” floating around, and may explain why my pond is choked with lillies. I thin them out every other week.

Another lily dweller I caught, I assume it is a dragonfly nymph?

This rock has been in its current location for ever, I noticed it glowing after the rains today. It has been a day of finding treasure.
It looked amazing and reminded me of:

The Nazca lines in Peru.
The Nazca lines are series of geoglyphs located in the Nazca Desert

“psst! we didn’t create those lines by the way. Now this we did create, but those, definately not.”

Moving on to the front of the property – this bed has been such a trouper over the last three months. I have watered it perhaps 3-4 times and it still looks healthy. You just can’t beat rosemary, succulents, and palms for staying power.

Potato vine going berserk in my golden
bamboo container, I really need to paint my house.
What am I talking about, this was a planned distressed
look to contrast the vibrant vine…not!

Foreground, Mexican Bush Sage, then weeping
bamboo, then golden bamboo, all hanging in there well
considering this years harsh conditions.

Front deck covered in red passion vine.

Mexican Petunia, not only does it endure high
heat and humidity, but it is also a performer in
drought-like conditions. Pride of barbados above it
and purple heart to the lower right.

Stay Tuned for:
“Fish & Chips”

All material © 2008 for east_side_patch. Unauthorized reproduction prohibited.

After walking back from dumping a bucket of water on one of my bamboos,
I shot a quick glance onto one of my Irises and saw this hugging horror scene.
I ran inside to retrieve my camera (which I usually always have on me) and cautiously re-approached the monster…
could it be a scorpion? surely not! in East austin?
I positioned my camera to full macro mode, put on my safari outfit, loaded my
blunderbuss with buckshot and feeling safer, investigated further.

Moving around to the side of the beast I could now hear its laboured
breathing intermingling with a blood curdling series of grunts and rattles.
I released the safety latch, and scoured the nearby terrain for a large
prodding stick. This specimen was one I intended to cage and bring back into
civilization alive, perhaps for a travelling side-show?

“I can understand why people would pay good money to see an
attractive, handsome giant ape such as myself in a side-show, but that alien
buggy thing?… Please”. (snort)
“Anyone know a good dentist”?

I turned my camera up side down and did a blind shot of the specimen. I looked at the shot in preview mode and immediately recoiled backwards into my asparagus ferns. I brushed myself down and glanced around nervously to see if someone had seen me.

The wizened wings, the lobster claws – it looked like an inch long giant flea!

At this point I arbitrarily recounted a story my father in law told me some time back, about a very pleasant conversation he had with a “Lobsterboy” at the State Fair in Dallas.
I digress.

“Lobster Boy” Fred Wilson was born
in Somerville, Massachussetts in
1866.

With the precision of a really bad surgeon I scrambled for my prodding stick and proceeded to start prodding the abomination, I prodded some more only to find that the creature that once inhabited this creature was gone!

Okay, okay so it is just the shell of an emerged cicada, but if it was 5ft long it would be terrifying! I need to stop watching so much sci-fi!

I caught this one in a local park. It actually flew around us, went way up in the air then dive bombed my wife’s foot…thwack, almost sending her into labor! This caused a chain reaction of high pitched sreaming, first from my wife, then from my 3 year old, who had no real idea why she was even screaming. I thought about joining in, but decided against it. Anyway I think this stunned the creature, allowing me to get this shot. The wing structure is amazing. (click then click again for a close-up)

And now for something completely different:


Mmmmm what is this now, blue paint that happens
to match my socks – what could this be? Queer eye
for the yard guy?

The panel that I was using to visualize my “Doorway to Nowhere” I decided
needed a sprucing, after all I anticipate a rather long time delay
to find an antique door that a) I like, and b) that I can afford. I will be living with this fence for some time, so I decided that it will be Azure blue in the interim, to remind me of the cooling trade winds of the Carribean. Ahhh!
I gave it a good sanding, cut off the rotten edge down one side, then gave it 4 coats of satin blue paint.  I feel better already.

For once the 200 degree weather worked in my favor – by the time I had finished one coat, it was already dry at the other end!

Here it is hoisted into position, I went with the blue to contrast the weeping bamboo, and Palm Grass

…and all of this was going on to the repeated backdrop of:
“Daddy, I have caught a huge, huge, huge wiggly shark” (repeat 20 times)
Each time I had to put down my paintbrush to “take it off the hook”!!!

When I had finished my impromptu painting, I attacked the future home of my lavender bed with a pick axe. If lavender likes poor soil like the books say, it should thrive in here! The soil here better resembles the lunar surface (with less nutrients), it is also compacted and generally as much use as an ashtray on a motorcycle.

After discovering this I have now decided to remove the top few inches of “dirt” and cart it to my front yard to create some mounds before I cover it in decomposed granite and plant it up . . . ah the joy! I intend to do some serious drainage work in here, yes my pick axe and I are to be reaquainted once more. (I have not touched my pick axe since I attacked my water feature with it, quite some time ago. (see earlier post: http://east-side-patch.livejournal.com/2357.html))
Or was that my sledge hammer? or both?

Other Michael Phelps right now:

Look at how much these bad boys have grown! amazing.

And to end on a cooler note. If you squint your eyes, it could be frost, tell me it could!

Stay Tuned for:
“Pick Axel Rose”

All material © 2008 for east_side_patch. Unauthorized reproduction prohibited.