Bamboo

“Life and Death”

With the rains have come a bumper bloom and a pronounced artificial grape aroma all around my back porch…

…this week is the week of the Mountain Laurel in Central Texas.

Sophora secundiflora


I keep this one pruned up as high as I can, I think they look better when the trunk is partially exposed.

The bees have been swarming the short-lived blooms on the tree.

Talking of small trees / shrubs…

…All the loquats

Eriobotrya japonica


around the Patch have also responded to the rains and sun, sending out an explosion of new growth. The name loquat derives from lou gwat, the Cantonese pronunciation of its old classical Chinese name.  In modern Chinese, it is more commonly known as pipa from the resemblance of its shape to that of the Chinese musical instrument pipa.





This is the first year that these shrub / small trees have reached a height that has really started to change the perimeter aesthetic of the Patch.  Surprisingly they were not effected by the cold snap, it seems they do not mind dry cold but have a deep hatred of wet freezes like we have had in previous years. Even when they do get nipped, with a quick cutting of the frozen parts, they bounce back extremely fast.

Even with all of the new growth happening right now, I am still discovering frost killed plants.  This wizened agave reminds me of Nero’s ship emerging from the “singularity event”.

“Stop being ridiculous ESP, or I will send some red matter into the core of your home-world.”

Not so much red matter as green!  New growth on the Inland sea oats, the feather grasses…

and the Fatsia Japonica, this one was warming it’s glossy alien looking fingers to the sun.

Giant Timber Bamboo also looking glossy after a recent shower.

Yes the Patch is finally breaking dormancy.

With the resurgence of all this life in the Patch there sadly was life’s cold counterpart.



The first thing very odd, like a harbinger of death from the sky, was a Grackle…a male grackle, that I see all the time as the sun sets, talking a final drink from my stock-tank before nightfall.  This grackle is in it’s prime adorning regal robes of purple and black, but today this dark knight had fallen to an enemy, slain, I surmise, by a warrior of the feline variety.

The ESP witches swooped out of my Post Oak in some sadistic anticipation of a final breath, their breaths foul.  http://www.eastsidepatch.com/about-the-esp-witches/

The grackle landed on the side of my stock-tank, with one of it’s legs in tatters.  The poor bird drank, bled like a bad actor, delivered it’s sleepy hollow omen, then flew up to a nearby ligustrum.  About an hour later, the last remaining fish of my original trio, the great Grandfather of all my remaining fish, appeared to have beached itself like a whale up onto a submerged marginal plant in the same pond.  A coincidence?  Thinking the fish had accidentally grounded itself, I cupped it in my hands and released it back into deeper water, but something was still terribly wrong.

No, not that!

No sooner as I released the fish, it found it’s way back to the same spot, almost like it was deliberately trying to end it’s life.  The fish with the red spot on it’s back desperately wanted to help it, it seemed seriously concerned and would not leave the old dying fish alone.  It kept nuzzling it, pushing it as if to say no, you can’t be done yet.  It even managed to dislodge it once again into deeper water.  It kept on nudging it and swimming right up against it, I had never seen anything like it.  The old fish once again mustered up some energy and drove itself up onto the same plant, this time I did not interfere. The red-spotted fish never once strayed from it’s side.

It was like a really sad episode of flipper! Do they exist?

I have never witnessed such social behavior from these aquatic creatures.  As the sun set in the Patch, I left them both in peace.  I believe the morning will bring a new addition to my compost pile, I just wonder if the spotted fish will still be by it’s side.  Goodnight old fish friend.

On a lighter note:

Ivy going completely crazy with the almost perfect growing conditions.

My stone crop waterfall has finally started to take shape, streaming down the rocky escarpment that never made it as a water feature.

And this variegated pittosporum has made the perfect camp-out area for the Patch hobbits.  The sweet orange blossoms that are just about to bloom will perfume this part of the garden for the next few weeks, this plant is not called “mock orange” for nothing.  For shady areas, like under my post-oak, the light colored leaves add interest and a spot of brightness in the shade, it is one of the best small trees for deep shade.  The plant makes an excellent specimen plant and a beautiful tree form can be achieved when it is trimmed correctly.  Like my Texas mountain Laurels, I like mine to be trimmed up high – one tough durable plant, that can withstand drought, this one is about five years old.

Purple leaf Sand Cherry,

Prunus X Cistena


is also in full bloom right now…

Again, a great drought resistant small shrub, and a great specimen to provide splashes of purple in the garden.  Mine is still quite small in width,  but this shrub will get to 7-10′ tall and wide over time.  The shrub is relatively short lived though at 10-15 years…we will see!

This Agave americana var.marginata ‘Aurea’ looks like it is stretching is arms out and yawning after a long and harsh winter… (well harsh for Texas anyway!)

And finally…

Cherry tomatoes in!  Fingers crossed we are done with the cold.


Inspirational Image of the week:

This is an early-afternoon infrared view over Tresco Abbey Garden in Isles of Scilly, England, looking south. A tiny, four-day-old crescent moon is just visible. (Though I challenge you to spot it!) This photo was taken by Jonathan Berman, who won the title of International Garden Photographer of the Year, last year…how did I miss this picture!

And here is the island of Tresco…not a bad looking place!  The island is renowned for its plants and its collection of shipwrecked figureheads of all things. The gardens shrug off salt spray and Atlantic gales to remarkably host 20,000 exotic plants in sub-tropical beauty.  The tropical garden is home to species from 80 countries, ranging from Brazil to New Zealand and Burma to South Africa. How can this be possible twenty miles south of the English Cornish coast?  Well by building tall windbreaks of Monterey Pine and by building high walls, that’s how.

The garden was built by the merchant banker and avid plant collector Augustus Smith who took over the residence in 1838, he successfully designed and channeled the weather up and over the network of walled enclosures.  He also created a series of terraces, drier terraces at the top suit South African and Australian plants, those at the bottom provide the humidity that favors flora from New Zealand and South America.

Statues symbolic of natural forces punctuate this sub-tropical garden.

Happy St Patrick’s Day from the ESP!


Stay Tuned for:

“Jurassic Patch”


All material © 2010 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by  late  (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

“Toad in the Hole”

With the painting in the Patch almost finished, it was time I created some more work for myself, today the Eye of Sauron cast a cold gaze on this garden scene…

The scale of this Mexican weeping bamboo and the stock-tanked golden bamboo where the Tahoe hit has disturbed me for quite some time.  The plants are just too tall in front of the house, what had been my thought process here? A momentary loss of sanity?  Anyway, my primal Advil taking instinct told me this was going to be one tough dig!  The one-ton rock you can see in front of the feeder tank has not moved since it fell off the back of the wagon that delivered my last six yards of decomposed granite, six months ago.

“Fascinating ESP, your rock strangely resembles and parallels this similar unmovable rock on Vulcan.”

I was supposed to get a bunch of rocks that weighed in at a ton, I ended up with one, yes just the one, one that I have no chance of remotely moving by myself.

It is a really cool rock though and it looks like the shape of Texas from the right angle, with one eye shut, standing on your head, etc, etc.  Today I was overhauling this area.  I knew that the Mexican weeping bamboo was not going to go down, or out of the ground for that matter, without a major shovel fight, it was quite established after all…

…quite established indeed.  The root-ball was about four feet around and about ten feet deep, okay I exaggerate.  My plan was to split this plant in half and relocate it to the back of my property. Splitting a bamboo’s root-ball seems good in theory, until you actually get into the actual splitting process.

Once again I was so happy I had a full steel shovel, nothing else would have taken the strain that I was subjecting this implement to as I worked my way around the root-ball.  I could hear things snapping and popping, I just hoped it was the plants roots rather then some of my tendons.

Oh yes you had better stay rigid trusty old shovel, because a Darwin Award could be awarded to me if you snap right now! The plant moaned and groaned, and my shovel and I followed suit with an occasional “why you little…” thrown in on my part for good measure.  Eventually I felt the final roots give and the beast was finally freed from the earth, it immediately started to scream and object like an unearthed mandrake root.  I laid on my back looking up at the sky, seeing stars.

Next stop…the Tahoe dented stock-tank that housed my golden bamboo.

This extraction was easy in comparison.

I removed all of the soil and rocks out of the tank, then wheeled it to the back of my back garden to hunt for a relocation spot. I did have a surprise when I first moved the tank…

I found this poor pale Gulf-coast toad hunkered down, hibernating underneath it.  This ‘toad in the hole’ quickly retreated deeper into his winter sanctuary at my rude disturbance.  I feared for him as the ESP Witches have already hung up their nasty hessian sacks in the post oak in anticipation of the spring toad cull.

B. valliceps


has the most extensive ridging of any toad in its geographic range. The ridges extend from the nose, to the back of the head. With a branch that wraps around the back side of the eye. I placed a few strategic rocks around and over him to offer once again some semblance of privacy,  I just hope it was enough.

Here are both plants transplanted into their brand new homes:










And that takes the stock-tank count up to seven in my back garden.  Now if only I had a small Roman garrison to help me move that one-ton boulder at the front.

Moving on…

The Patch catching some late afternoon rays.  The post oak and giant timber bamboo create some interesting shadows on the house. The Gopher plant in the foreground is in full swing right now…

I like the way the blue – silver foliage echoes the color of the Sedum reflexum ‘Blue Spruce’.

The emerging purple blooms of this mountain laurel looks great against the new green color of the house.  This confirmed to me that I need to a) get some more laurels around the Patch and b) plant a large bed of Mexican bush sage at the front of house to replace the bamboos that I have just ripped up.

Finally…

These gangly chaps are all over the Patch right now, both indoors and out.
Although some people think these flies look like Texas-sized mosquitoes, they are wrongly called “mosquito hawks.”  Crane flies are large tan-colored fragile flies with long legs. Adults and larvae do not feed on mosquitoes, in fact adult crane flies feed on nectar or they do not feed at all, once they become adults, these noble creatures exist only to mate and die. Crane fly larvae feed primarily on decomposing organic matter, in compost piles, they often occur on the soil surface below the pile of decaying vegetation.  Adults have long slender legs which are easily broken and may be missing in some specimens.
Crane flies are a food source for many birds and many other insects and carnivores…

“Well, we love them don’t we honey?”
“We certainly do George”.

To finish on a “Ewww” note…

Giant carnivorous plant
Giant carnivorous plant

Nepenthes Attenboroughii


A plant that just happens to reflect the new color scheme of the Patch, and a plant I could have really used when all of this rat nonsense was going on in my shed: http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2008/11/dead-in-a-shed/

Botanists have uncovered a carnivorous plant in the Philippines that is large enough to digest a whole rat. (The plant is about a meter across with these cups at the end of stalks to catch prey).

Nepenthes northiana


Here is the carnivorous pitcher plant preparing to tuck into a rat.  Can you believe this?  Look at the remarkable painted coloration on the lips of these cups.

“Oh no! I told him he should have become a head-chef ” Brrr… (whiskers involuntary twitch and large teeth bite upper lip, tiny limb and small ear movements).

Stewart McPherson, one of the botanists who trekked deep into the Philippine forest to make the discovery, described the plant…

“Around the mouth of the pitcher are secretions of nectar which attracts insects and small animals. The rim has lots of waxy downward-pointing ridges which help prey fall directly into the pitcher.  The pitchers are half full of a liquid consisting of acids and enzymes which help break down its prey. These plants grow in really harsh areas where soil quality is very poor — often pure gravel or sand. Catching insects allows the plant to augment nutrients that it otherwise wouldn’t have access to.” … Mmmm perhaps a mass planting in the hell-strip? That would be novel!

Inspirational image of the week:

Talking about the top of a remote mountain!  I have decided that this is where I want to spend my Autumn years when they arrive, a house nestled up in the trees, a Heli-drop of deli produce and beer once a month, fast internet connection, and “raised” (ahem) vegetable beds…you get the absurd picture.

“I like that place Carl”
“Me too Ellie”!


Stay Tuned for:

“Life and Death”


All material © 2010 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by  late  (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

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