ESP extremities

“Life and Death”

ESPatch Mar 18, 2010 14 comments

With the rains have come a bumper bloom and a pronounced artificial grape aroma all around my back porch…

…this week is the week of the Mountain Laurel in Central Texas.

Sophora secundiflora

I keep this one pruned up as high as I can, I think they look better when the trunk is partially exposed.

The bees have been swarming the short-lived blooms on the tree.

Talking of small trees / shrubs…

…All the loquats

Eriobotrya japonica

around the Patch have also responded to the rains and sun, sending out an explosion of new growth. The name loquat derives from lou gwat, the Cantonese pronunciation of its old classical Chinese name. In modern Chinese, it is more commonly known as pipa from the resemblance of its shape to that of the Chinese musical instrument pipa.

This is the first year that these shrub / small trees have reached a height that has really started to change the perimeter aesthetic of the Patch. Surprisingly they were not effected by the cold snap, it seems they do not mind dry cold but have a deep hatred of wet freezes like we have had in previous years. Even when they do get nipped, with a quick cutting of the frozen parts, they bounce back extremely fast.

Even with all of the new growth happening right now, I am still discovering frost killed plants. This wizened agave reminds me of Nero’s ship emerging from the “singularity event”.

“Stop being ridiculous ESP, or I will send some red matter into the core of your home-world.”

Not so much red matter as green! New growth on the Inland sea oats, the feather grasses…

and the Fatsia Japonica, this one was warming it’s glossy alien looking fingers to the sun.

Giant Timber Bamboo also looking glossy after a recent shower.

Yes the Patch is finally breaking dormancy.

With the resurgence of all this life in the Patch there sadly was life’s cold counterpart.

The first thing very odd, like a harbinger of death from the sky, was a Grackle…a male grackle, that I see all the time as the sun sets, talking a final drink from my stock-tank before nightfall. This grackle is in it’s prime adorning regal robes of purple and black, but today this dark knight had fallen to an enemy, slain, I surmise, by a warrior of the feline variety.

The ESP witches swooped out of my Post Oak in some sadistic anticipation of a final breath, their breaths foul. http://www.eastsidepatch.com/about-the-esp-witches/

The grackle landed on the side of my stock-tank, with one of it’s legs in tatters. The poor bird drank, bled like a bad actor, delivered it’s sleepy hollow omen, then flew up to a nearby ligustrum. About an hour later, the last remaining fish of my original trio, the great Grandfather of all my remaining fish, appeared to have beached itself like a whale up onto a submerged marginal plant in the same pond. A coincidence? Thinking the fish had accidentally grounded itself, I cupped it in my hands and released it back into deeper water, but something was still terribly wrong.

No, not that!

No sooner as I released the fish, it found it’s way back to the same spot, almost like it was deliberately trying to end it’s life. The fish with the red spot on it’s back desperately wanted to help it, it seemed seriously concerned and would not leave the old dying fish alone. It kept nuzzling it, pushing it as if to say no, you can’t be done yet. It even managed to dislodge it once again into deeper water. It kept on nudging it and swimming right up against it, I had never seen anything like it. The old fish once again mustered up some energy and drove itself up onto the same plant, this time I did not interfere. The red-spotted fish never once strayed from it’s side.

It was like a really sad episode of flipper! Do they exist?

I have never witnessed such social behavior from these aquatic creatures. As the sun set in the Patch, I left them both in peace. I believe the morning will bring a new addition to my compost pile, I just wonder if the spotted fish will still be by it’s side. Goodnight old fish friend.

On a lighter note:

Ivy going completely crazy with the almost perfect growing conditions.

My stone crop waterfall has finally started to take shape, streaming down the rocky escarpment that never made it as a water feature.

And this variegated pittosporum has made the perfect camp-out area for the Patch hobbits. The sweet orange blossoms that are just about to bloom will perfume this part of the garden for the next few weeks, this plant is not called “mock orange” for nothing. For shady areas, like under my post-oak, the light colored leaves add interest and a spot of brightness in the shade, it is one of the best small trees for deep shade. The plant makes an excellent specimen plant and a beautiful tree form can be achieved when it is trimmed correctly. Like my Texas mountain Laurels, I like mine to be trimmed up high – one tough durable plant, that can withstand drought, this one is about five years old.

Purple leaf Sand Cherry,

Prunus X Cistena

is also in full bloom right now…

Again, a great drought resistant small shrub, and a great specimen to provide splashes of purple in the garden. Mine is still quite small in width, but this shrub will get to 7-10′ tall and wide over time. The shrub is relatively short lived though at 10-15 years…we will see!

This Agave americana var.marginata ‘Aurea’ looks like it is stretching is arms out and yawning after a long and harsh winter… (well harsh for Texas anyway!)

And finally…

Cherry tomatoes in! Fingers crossed we are done with the cold.

Inspirational Image of the week:

This is an early-afternoon infrared view over Tresco Abbey Garden in Isles of Scilly, England, looking south. A tiny, four-day-old crescent moon is just visible. (Though I challenge you to spot it!) This photo was taken by Jonathan Berman, who won the title of International Garden Photographer of the Year, last year…how did I miss this picture!

And here is the island of Tresco…not a bad looking place! The island is renowned for its plants and its collection of shipwrecked figureheads of all things. The gardens shrug off salt spray and Atlantic gales to remarkably host 20,000 exotic plants in sub-tropical beauty. The tropical garden is home to species from 80 countries, ranging from Brazil to New Zealand and Burma to South Africa. How can this be possible twenty miles south of the English Cornish coast? Well by building tall windbreaks of Monterey Pine and by building high walls, that’s how.

The garden was built by the merchant banker and avid plant collector Augustus Smith who took over the residence in 1838, he successfully designed and channeled the weather up and over the network of walled enclosures. He also created a series of terraces, drier terraces at the top suit South African and Australian plants, those at the bottom provide the humidity that favors flora from New Zealand and South America.

Statues symbolic of natural forces punctuate this sub-tropical garden.

Happy St Patrick’s Day from the ESP!

Stay Tuned for:

“Jurassic Patch”

All material © 2010 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

“Has he Been”?

ESPatch Dec 20, 2009 16 comments

This anole is currently living in our Christmas tree! I tried to get it outside but it just came right back in through one of our many gaps and holes in our walls. I suppose it was finding some “relative” warmth, or perhaps it is just getting into the Christmas spirit, hard to tell. I now spend as much time looking for the anole as I do admiring the tree ornaments. I could have sworn the other night I caught a glimpse of it, deep in the interior of the tree, adorning a small piece of cotton-wool on it’s pronounced chin, whipping a reindeer ornament with it’s tail with a look of Christmas glee on his lizard face…honestly I did!

Here it is making it’s way over the enormous cushion hill to our tree.

The poor anole looks like it might not make it to the holidays, lets just say he did not look well, he was also very skinny, I guess he is not finding too many bugs on our fake Christmas tree! I just hope that it doesn’t drop dead and fall into the presents under the tree. Now that would be unexpected Christmas present on Christmas morning for someone!

Moving On…

These old rusty Christmas bells are what is left of my desert trumpet vine flowers, this vine put on a stunning bloom show this year. In fact…

there is still one bloom left.

So strange that only one bloom still exists on the entire vine, and it is healthy and vibrant, even stranger that this singular bloom has its very own intellectual.

I have checked in on this inhabitant for the last four days. We discuss everything from philosophy to Tiger Woods. It seems this final bloom is this insect’s final vestige for the year, and it was not about to be up-rooted from it’s comfortable purple home.

I am not sure what this turtle-like bug is, but I am pretty sure it can not be as good for the plant as it is a conversationalist.

Talking of something that is not good…

Remember the “giant tongue” from my last post , well there have been some shocking developments on the grosser front. The cow tongue, it appears, has developed a propensity for lapping up red wine from the feeding trough, and judging from the color of it, magnums of it.

Ewww! Ewww! And a rather exaggerated lateral knee motion.

If you want to find out what plant this nasty, curled abomination originated from, you can find the answer hiding in here… http://www.eastsidepatch.com/visual-comparativies/ I think you will be quite surprised. I promise, no more images of this.

I was quite surprised at the details on this holly fern.

Cyrtomium falcatum

I think it may have contracted the plant equivalent of the measles. I turned over the leaf to inspect the pox further.

The leaves on the holly fern are very glossy with a leathery texture, waxy on the surface and lighter colored beneath. I was shocked to see the extent of the infestation.

NERD ALERT…NERD ALERT…

The closer macro inspection of the underside of the leaves revealed that the pox were actually the geometric reproductive spores of the plant. Remarkable. If you want to grow a few hundred holly ferns like I am about to attempt, this is what you do… collect the ripe spores on a piece of paper placed under spore bearing leaves. (Adjusts glasses). You can see a couple of spores on this leaf have already dropped off. Sow spores on damp peat moss in late winter. (they germinate best at a temperature of 68-70 degrees) this is going to be tough to achieve in my drafty “galleon ship” of a house (insert nerdy snort)!

The peat moss should be kept constantly moist and covered with glass or plastic. Once new plants are large enough to handle they can be transplanted into individual containers.

Staying in the same shady bed as the holly fern, my White Wood Sorrel is still putting out it’s ghostly blooms.

My Sorrels always have a growth spurt after I chop down all the Hoja Santa that usually cover them, they appreciate the little extra light.

Here is one of my hacked-back Hoja Santa plants, it is already trying to throw up new shoots, very primordial.

This kale was a freebie from the Natural Gardener. It was handed to my eldest hobbit who proceeded to take it home and plant it in my raised herb and pepper stock-tank with her tiny trowel. When our recent cold snap came she saw me shaking my head here, muttering obscenities over there, as I assessed the damage in the Patch, then she remembered her kale. Her face got serious then it had a look of deep concern as she made her way over to the stock-tank, eagerly peering over the edge.

Naturally the kale was loving the cold weather, there was a squeal of delight as she saw the plant had jumped in size. I saw these rain drops sticking to it and rather predictably started to photograph them to the background rap of “can we eat it yet?…can we eat it yet, Daddy, Can we eat it yet? (repeat 7.5 times), I even started to do some really bad Ali G “mouth” percussion to accompany the monologue just to keep me sane as I took these pictures!

The poor Botox Lady was getting “consumed” by this ice plant. I heard her from inside the house (as, I am sure the whole neighborhood did,) her absurd Austrian accent screaming out into the night air…

“Get it out of mine eyes! ESP, Get zit out, I can’t see”! mutter, mutter, mutter…ESP!

“Jimmy four fingers” … An arthritic rogue finger on my pine cone cactus demanded my attention this week, it tried to pinch my car-keys from my pocket as I tried to alleviate the eye suffering of the Botox Lady with my pruners. It was time to chop off some knuckles in an attempt to grow some more “fingers” in different parts of the Patch.

A nasty gangster affair, granted, but a necessity. I had no choice but to send a message to the rest of the finger-cones.

Here is the first knuckle that I snapped off…the cactus screamed at the loss of one of it’s core digits, like I remotely cared…wait! where is my thumb?

here it is re-planted in my middle succulent and cactus bed. “Fingers” (ahem) crossed, it will sprout roots and grow.

Noticed This Week…

Meyer Lemons, almost ready for the picking.

I have pulled so many dandelions this year, what odd plants they are, annoying, but quite odd.

Another odd-ball is this tiny succulent, it looks like some Ice-Queen’s headdress.

“Call that a headdress”?

Or perhaps not!

Inspirational images of the week, another modern Hobbit hole…

Great Building in Switzerland by Dutch architectural studio in cooperation with SeARCH Studio Christian Muller Architects.

I can see why you would need the fence around the top of it, staggering home with a take-out Christmas curry or a doner kebab from a local alpine lodge could be a little… errr… lethal?

“Merry Christmas!”

From us all here in the East Side Patch!