“Why is the Rum Gone?”

ESPatch Jan 25, 2014 9 comments

Eighty degrees one day,

selling girl scout cookies in teeshirts…

…then ice, how the temperatures can swing in Texas.

There was just enough accumulation on this lawn chair to eek out a couple of lame snowballs for an equally lame snowball fight.

Which was probably a good thing.

This is what we needed!

Stock tanks froze over once again encapsulating lacewings that had drowned on the surface.

No, it is not a Popsicle, Bear.

Loquats also had a cold casing,

and I think I can safely say my variegated gingers have seen better days,

much better days.

Out of all the frost bitten plants in my garden the first prize for ‘most aesthetically unpleasing plant after a freeze’

has to go to

yes…the purple heart.

“I just knew it was going to win Charles.”

“Yes Dear, it really is astonishingly aesthetically unpleasing .”

Not only is this plant a mess to look at, it will most certainly attempt to cover you in purple juice during clean up as an annoying side activity.

Lets take one more look:

The interwoven dead leaves that this soggy plant apparently ‘collects’ over time completes the award winning industrial spillage look.

Aloe also suffers in the cold,

the softened pulp on the inside of this frozen aloe arm felt very odd and kept him entertained for all of …30 seconds.

This Mexican lime tree kept me busy for a little longer as I beat it repeatedly with a blunt instrument to remove the dead foliage. This activity had the added benefit of making me feel much better about the upcoming purple heart clean up.

“This lime tree was repeatedly beaten around its crown and lower limbs with a blunt object Watson, isn’t it obvious? The exfoliation, the…blah, blah…purple juice on the perpetrators gardening gloves…blah, blah, blah.”

Moving Along:

This cactus causes me to do a Sheldon laugh when I walk past it in my Hell-strip.

It has a very distinctive Jack Sparrow swagger to it, and recently, I noticed, its first tattoo.

And on that note…

Stay Tuned for:

“Taking the Hobbits to Isengarden”

All material © 2014 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

“Up In Flames”

ESPatch Dec 7, 2013 2 comments

Mist flowers did not bloom as long as usual this year but they still had their fair share of visitors, like this

American Lady,

Vanessa virginienis

Note: The small white dot in the orange of the forewing distinguishes American Lady from the Painted Lady.

Another frequent visitor to the mist flowers are these little iridescent metallic bees or

Agapostemon texanus

or is it angelicus?

I don’t know.

Loquats also have an abundance of flowers this year,

flowers

I think they liked our wetter than usual Autumn.

flowers

Our recent freezing temperatures have ushered in some strange activities in the Patch.

faces

When faced with prolonged periods of time indoors we usually resort to Monopoly and arguing, but the latest trend is the cutting-out of magazine mouths to while away the dark and cold hours.

I took advantage of the latest cold snap to put our Christmas tree up, with plenty of help, naturally.

This is an activity that traditionally has me coated in an 80-degree sweat as I fight to a) get the tree into the house and b) wrestle it into its stupid base, tightening those irritating metal prongs that I am convinced are too small to even reach the trunk of the tree.

As promised here is a slow air fitting for the cold, dark weather we have been experiencing of late.

Grab yourself a glass, adjust your volume and put in some earplugs for “The Dark Island” and the reel “Miss Girdle”.

It got so cold the other day,

I burnt my own strobilus!

http://www.eastsidepatch.com/2013/07/trouble-with-the-old-strobilus/

Well it has been looking a bit peeky for a while now,

then I noticed this oozing out of the center of it:

Enough was enough.

It was onto the pyre with the old strobilus.

Moving very quickly along…

Cigar plant is heating up in the cold,

as are the celosia, and up until this week so were the canna lilies.

The bold color,

its foliage looking like flames,

what a difference a week can make.

Drum roll and…

and as for my Hoja Santa…

…well, lets just say that they now look decidedly unwell.

In contrast my satsumas look about perfect, it was time I gave one a go, and by I,

I mean him.

There was some trepidation going into the annual tasting ceremony but the satsumas were apparently off to a good start. There was a nervous thumbs up in the middle but the end notes were an obvious let down – a bland blend of unsweetened chewy fruit with a distinct hint of grossness.

Ah the disappointment.

Oh well,

there is always next year.

Stay Tuned for:

“He’s Checking it twice”

All material © 2013 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by late (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

Frost